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A mother-in-law stopped by unexpectedly the recently married couple's house. She knocks on the door, then immediately walks in. She is shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"I'm waiting for Jeff to come home from work," the daughter-in-law answered.
"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.
"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.
"Love dress? But you're naked!"
"Jeff loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it makes me happy."
The mother-in-law on the way home thought about the love dress. When she got home she got undressed, showered, put on her best perfume and expectantly waited for her husband, lying provocatively on the couch.
Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her naked on the couch.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"This is my love dress," she replied.
"Needs ironing," he says" "What's for dinner?"
 

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Ta da boom! :)
 

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So the other day my wife walked in and caught me blow drying my Johnson... When she asked what I was doing I responded with... Just warming up your dinner dear!
 

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>>>>>>>> LOL! <<<<<<<<< :ltr:
 

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So the other day my wife walked in and caught me blow drying my Johnson... When she asked what I was doing I responded with... Just warming up your dinner dear!
Protein Slurpee?
 

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Discussion Starter #7
So the other day my wife walked in and caught me blow drying my Johnson... When she asked what I was doing I responded with... Just warming up your dinner dear!
This thread has been HIJACKED! LOL
 

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A joke tread ... Nice ... No hijack just fun mate


A suicide bomber died and went to heaven, as foretold. When he
arrived there, he met Allah, and he said to Allah that he was ready
to claim his virgins, as promised. Out of curiosity he asked Allah why
there were so many virgins in heaven.

Allah regarded him for a moment, then replied, "Actually, the 72
virgins are here in heaven because assholes like you murdered them
before they could experience the pleasure of sex. So you're here to
service them. Since they're virgins, they're quite sexually ravenous;
and, frankly, you'll be on constant, exhausting duty. And I shall
banish you from Paradise should you fail!"

The bomber responded, "Well, I guess I can live with that. How hard
can it be to keep 72 women satisfied for all eternity?"

Allah replied, "Who said they were women?
:eek:
 

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A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck, and everyone inside dies. They then get to meet their maker, and because of the grief they have experienced; He decides to grant them one wish each, before they enter Paradise.
They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is. "I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it is done.
The second one in line hears this and says "I want to be gorgeous too." Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted. This goes on for a while but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in line starts laughing. When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the floor, laughing.
Finally, God reaches this guy and asks him what his wish will be. The guy calms down and says: " Make 'em all ugly again."
 
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